Moniker Monday: -STER

That's a picture of Gus Johnson and he gets buckets.

Do not fear world wide web, Bushwood has not forgotten about you. It has however been an extremely busy couple of weeks with musical instrument bands, basketball, the start of baseball, and the return of Jesus. Things will return to a certain level of normalcy around here within the week, whatever that may be is debatable.

Today's Moniker Monday is -ster. Allow me to explain with some examples: "Goddammit! Looks like the Bradster is gonna be extra tough on checking everybody's side work tonight", "Not so fast on seconds Craigster, not everyone has had a chance to get their first corn dog yet", "I wouldn't go countin' out the Jeffster yet, he is a true second half Foosball player."

Now questions might arise as to what should be done with names that don't translate well when adding the -ster suffix such as Anthony, Jeremey, or Rebecca. Tone-ster, Jerster, and Beckster, Boom. This weeks moniker is meant to be challenging for you this week, see what you can do with it and as feel free to add "ole" before the name as a crutch to get you started, i.e. "Here comes Ole Tedster!".

As always take it and run with it, what you do with it is yours. And as a special bonus to the atrocity that is the "National Championship" game tonight and the man, the myth, the legend Gus Johnson; here is a bonus funniest thing you'll see all day:



Judge Smails

Moniker Monday: PLAYA

This week's Monday Moniker is playa. Some examples: "Yikes playa! I haven't seen anybody go that crazy on a game of horseshoes since '86!" "I can see you came to party due to that liter of Malibu Rum in yo hand playa!" "Regardless of what you say playa, I'm still gonna be getting us two tickets to the Ace of Base reunion tour."

As with all of your Moniker Mondays, playa is best used to confuse your intended target. While your immediate assumption is that it will be the most effective in an urban environment, chances are you will get better results in the exact opposite setting. Correct execution of playa throughout this week could lead to you gaining some serious momentum towards a promotion at the office or staking your claim as man of the house.

Watch as Phil Dunphy demonstrates its correct use:



As always take it and run with it, what you do with it is yours. I know you're busy, hopefully not with this.

Judge Smails

Moniker Monday: CHIEF

Before we get down to business for Moniker Monday, need to cover a few things real quick. Thanks to Kansas and their spectacular effort against Northern Iowa, approximately 40% of the participants in the Bushwood Bracket are F'd in A. Thanks Kansas, keep up the great work of letting down your fans (but that's really mainly only because they live IN KANSAS). Currently, educator extraordinaire and state champion Alan Speer is dominating the field along with this guy as they both sit pretty with the highest possible point totals. Now, on to business.

Today's Moniker Monday is chief. Some examples: "Well hey there chief, guess nobody else gets any ranch for their chili n' cheese fries." "Not sure about you chief, but I could go for a deep tissue massage after all that ice dancing." "I don't care how many times you ask me chief, I don't think its a good idea for you to get personalized license plates."

Chief is a term to used to channel ones inner strength, although it can also be used to demean someone who thinks they are cooler than they really are. It is most effective when the individual on the receiving end is unaware of your intentions, thus heightening the level of excitement for you the Moniker distributor.

As always take it and run with it, what you do with it is yours. Toss some of your best examples in the comment section if you can find the time. I know you're busy, hopefully not with this.

Judge Smails

Moniker Monday: BIG CAT

Double dose of excitement today, not only are you getting a new Moniker but also a sample of some aesthetic changes coming soon to the site. A new logo, layout, and general increase in excellence is on its on way. Now on to business.

Todays Moniker Monday is big cat. Some examples: "Way to leave it all on the racquet ball court big cat." "Too bad you decided to go with the RC Cola over the Sam's Choice big cat." Or, "Hey big cat, we rentin' High School Musical 2 tonight or what?"

Big cat is an empowering term but also one that can be used to convey a confusing and thick layer of sarcasm. You may have your friends, or enemies, in utter bewilderment as to whether you are encouraging them or giving a back handed compliment. In either case, it is a weapon you will want to have in your arsenal.

As always take it and run with it, what you do with it is yours. Toss some of your best examples in the comment section if you can find the time. I know you're busy, hopefully not with this.

Judge Smails

Moniker Monday: BOSS

Here at Bushwood we don't only want to provide you with snippets of the arts to increase your existence, but also provide you with something to make your day to day life better. Hence the creation of Moniker Monday.

Moniker Monday will be a weekly segment dedicated to coining a new nickname that you should implement throughout the week. It can be used as a term of appreciation, affection, or sarcasm. Use and abuse it until you've infected your office, dorm room, or brothel of choice with this catchy term. No need to explain it any further, pretty simple.

Todays Moniker Monday is boss. Some examples: "Great game out there boss," "Hey boss, nice work on not putting more paper in the copier," "Whoaaa boss, take it easy! We don't have an unlimited supply of vasoline in the back!"

Take it and run with it, what you do with it is yours. Toss some of your best examples in the comment section if you can find the time. I know you're busy, but hopefully not with this. I know, I can't believe it exists either.

Remember...BOSS.

Judge Smails